advice – A S H Smyth http://www.ashsmyth.com Will write for money Mon, 09 Oct 2017 16:16:56 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.8.4 Two birds, one stone http://www.ashsmyth.com/two-birds-one-stone-2/ http://www.ashsmyth.com/two-birds-one-stone-2/#respond Fri, 06 Oct 2017 15:43:23 +0000 http://www.ashsmyth.com/?p=2162 Dear Amorist,

I recently made a joke about my pregnant wife – and found myself receiving several pointers.

‘Have lots of sex before the baby’s born,’ said one.

‘Watch loads of movies,’ said another.

Couldn’t we just watch porn, and kill two birds with one stone?

Yours, &c.

ASH Smyth, by email

]]> http://www.ashsmyth.com/two-birds-one-stone-2/feed/ 0 Advice, remembered http://www.ashsmyth.com/advice-remembered/ http://www.ashsmyth.com/advice-remembered/#comments Fri, 23 Nov 2012 13:12:45 +0000 http://www.ashsmyth.com/?p=1270 ‘Never go back to a place where you were happy.’

They will not remember you there.

]]> http://www.ashsmyth.com/advice-remembered/feed/ 2 A sympathetic reminder from the eco lobby, in this, your time of mourning http://www.ashsmyth.com/sympathetic-advice-from-the-eco-lobby-in-your-time-of-sorrow/ http://www.ashsmyth.com/sympathetic-advice-from-the-eco-lobby-in-your-time-of-sorrow/#respond Mon, 27 Dec 2010 08:59:16 +0000 http://www.ashsmyth.com/?p=390 The ocean is miles away. (Think of the carbon footprint!)

Why not have your relatives gather round the downstairs toilet and dump the ashes there?

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