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For The Critic

— The Nelson Evening Mail, Friday, January 18 1907
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Ethiopia has exported its first avocados by train.

The Communist Party banned photocopiers.

More geese than swans now live.

In Brazil there is a butterfly that uses its legs for running.

All Pakistani things are under one roof.

Cecil Court is never dull.

Alastair Cook took just one wicket in his entire test career.

The Saracens taught us how to preserve our dead.

‘Sealioning’ is a type of trolling or harassment in the form of incessant bad-faith invitations to engage in debate.

William Huskisson MP was the first person to die as the result of a railway accident.

Lots of proletarians wear overcoats nowadays.

Zulu IPA is brewed in Great Britain.

Beatles fans pray facing towards Macca.

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— The Nelson Evening Mail, July 17 1908
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A transgender man has had a baby five years after having one as a woman.

Sheikh Hamdan bin Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum, the Crown Prince of Dubai, is known as ‘Fazza’.

‘Ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Fuhrer’ is an advertisement for Hitler or something. It says this under a picture of him.

Old corned-beef’s rusty armour spreads disease.

Nice things cost money.

1.5 people is the exact wrong number to do anything efficiently.

England batsman Alastair Cook has played in his 150th test match at the WACA.

Author Boris Starling’s career began aged eight, when he plagiarised a story from a Tintin novel.

Aristotle walked a lot.

John-Boy Walton’s first spouse was Almira Gonzales. They divorced in 1993.

A female spy was the last woman to be executed in Finland.

Homeopathy is based on the false claim of the benefit of super-diluted substances and the principle of ‘like cures like’. While it has been debunked by hundreds of studies, people still want to believe in magic cures.

Don’t forget, many West Malling shops are open today.
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