— The Nelson Evening Mail, Thursday, September 6 1906
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Prince Gunarasa Casinader died in December 2018.

Poetry and buggery are twin-born brats.

Most people have no Russian friends.

Elephants chew their nails when they’re nervous.

In Istanbul, iron nails are believed to be the work of the Devil.

Diderot’s smile is a smile of complicity.

Short legs can’t climb tall walls.

Walter Benjamin couldn’t make a cup of tea.

43% of churches face the sunrise on the day of the saint for whom the church was named.

James Joyce’s grandson has died.

Sri Lankans love their exclamation marks!

You have to question a door policy which says no to trainers but a big thumbs-up t0 piss-soaked tramp shoes.

The face book need never be complete.
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— The Nelson Evening Mail, Wednesday, July 15 1908
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The comedian Joe Pasquale (born Joseph Ellis Pasquale) has not died.

The US government spends more per head on their dysfunctional healthcare system than the UK spends per person on the NHS.

There is not much colour in Lincolnshire.

There is a cricket team called the British Guiana Boers. They play in Boston, Massachusetts.

Mandarin and Arabic are different.

People who eat dark chocolate are less likely to be depressed than those who don’t.

Owls are the second-least intelligent birds in the world.

76.5% of Sri Lankans believe that members of their parliament have unexplained wealth.

You don’t have to spend the night alone.

Leeds Castle have late-availability wedding offers from just £7950.

The English-language folk song ‘Bobby Shafto’s Gone to Sea’ has a Roud index number of 1359.

Anthony McGowan has been named the Adidas High School Wrestler of the Week.

Batman gifs are the height of orientalism.
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