Skip to content

Category Archives: Fictions

Bleak Howzat!?— Charles Dickens pays a visit to The Cricket Club

(in loving memory of its former incarnation) . Colombo. The Galle and Pallakele matches lately over, the series lost, and the selectors falling back on Maitland Place in hopes of inspiration for the third and final test. The last of the erratic rains now gone, the water in the half-uncovered sewers stagnant, rank with garbage. [...]

WHAT’S YOUR FULL NAME, RANK, AND SERIAL NUMBER (SPECIAL OPS EDITION)?

Your Full Name, Rank, and Serial Number (Special Ops Edition) is: ‘Bob’ .

WHAT’S YOUR CARTHAGINIAN-GENERAL-WHO-IS-UNFAIRLY-DEEMED-LESS-NOTEWORTHY-THAN-HIS-CARTHAGINIAN-GENERAL-BROTHER NAME?

Your Carthaginian-General-who-is-Unfairly-Deemed-Less-Noteworthy-than-his-Carthaginian-General-Brother Name is: Hasdrubal .

WHAT’S YOUR AFRIKAANS-TRANSLATOR NAME?

Your Afrikaans-Translator Name is L’Angoustine Bezuidenhout .

Translator’s Note (after Khemiri, after Heti, after Valtat, after Coetzee, after Nooteboom, after Martin, after Kierkegaard)

What I would like to say by way of introduction to my essays on the art of writing, by A.B.C.D.E.F. Godthaab* (* Bear with me, please, while I endeavour to explain what is going on here.) . Twelve years ago, I wrote, with considerable emotional anguish, a long novel about a war against the languages. [...]

A short story

I am currently in possession of two secrets: . . . …

The hashtags of Omar Khayyam

#verses #wine #bread #thou (Enow?)

Joke

A cafetière falls down the stairs. *¡Bodum CRASH!*

‘Not to be’

Invited to decline the future of ‘to be’, I declined it in the here and now.

On the back of a picture postcard

I oughta have brought you here.