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Tag Archives: shopping

Ducks and cover

Ducks, Newburyport by Lucy Ellmann Galley Beggar Press, £14.99, pp1020 . Why, I asked some months back, in these pages, do the protagonists in American fiction these days seem so lost? What is it they’re all so het up about? Well… everything. At least according to the narrator of Ducks, Newburyport. Lucy Ellmann’s monster novel [...]

NEWS AT A GLANCE

. High top boots for dogs are now being sold in the shops of New York. — The Nelson Evening Mail, January 23 1907 . The first pedestrian has been killed by a self-driving car. Starbucks employees do not capitalise their As. The sound of the bagpipe fattens the sheep and lambs of all Arabia. [...]

NEWS AT A GLANCE

. Band instruments in use by the Salvation Army are worth £86,000. — The Nelson Evening Mail, July 17 1908 . A transgender man has had a baby five years after having one as a woman. Sheikh Hamdan bin Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum, the Crown Prince of Dubai, is known as ‘Fazza’. ‘Ein Volk, ein [...]

NEWS AT A GLANCE

. Miss Mary Elsen, of Chicago, is suing Dr. Charles Weser, a local doctor, for 60 breaches of promise during a four years’ courtship. — The Nelson Evening Mail, June 22 1912 . Soldiers are quite fond of children. Chopsticks are the reason the Chinese never invented custard. The senior members of the House of Commons are not [...]

The Pikey Laureate introduces Whitman to the high street

O ye women who go down unto the Co-Op in your onesies: What do you think you look like!?

Caveat; or – Overheard in ASDA

“Nah, I didn’t slap ‘er… (I could of, though!)”

Hades

In H&M a black shop-assistant carts flaxen-haired dummies downstairs.