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Tag Archives: The Pikey Laureate

‘hotmail’

hot mess hot men hot milk hot mail login

‘your broken heart’

for Rich Hardcastle  y ….you ….y ….Yeah yo ….you ….yo ….You’re you ….You’re ….you ….your your ….You’re ….your ….Yours your[ ] ….Amazon.co.uk ….mum’s ….cruel your b ….ballbag ….b ….bezzies your br ….br ….brothers ….brother your bro ….bro ….brothers ….brother your brok ….brok ….broken ….book your broke ….broken ….broke ….bloke your broken ….broken-down ….broken ….broken-hearted your [...]

A complete list of all those who have gone fishing, according to Benjamin Britten

1) Old Joe 2) Young Joe 3) You Know

Lines composed upon a can of Stella, spilt over my laptop

.             *–   #]# ~ 0#]@~9*. /70 +69574859658410+-*8+/98-+639*74 .             +/88-9+63   .             +-20300.20 .             ~~ .             ]+-3 -*82105263120152485-/

The Top Fifteen Or So Wittiest Oscar Wilde Quotes – according to his Twitter output (last 24hrs)

1) ‘Think tattoos have to be bold and dark? Think again! Check out these stunning white ink tats!’ 2) ‘You can’t get your childhood back but you can recreate it! Check out these awesome recreation photos.’ 3) ‘Wanna see a real-life Barbie doll? This is not Photoshopped! You’ve gotta see this to believe it’ 4) [...]

The Pikey Laureate introduces Whitman to the high street

O ye women who go down unto the Co-Op in your onesies: What do you think you look like!?

Winter

A bracing dawn run on the Devonshire coastline. My nutsack is blue.

Morning

Sharp colours, crisp sounds, a pleasant lightness of step. I am hung-over.

Ancient wisdom

Red sky at night: shepherds’ delight. Green ammonia-filled acrid smoke-piss in the morning: asparagus for dinner.

Haikus are like

postcards – no matter how concise you may be, you tend to run out of