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Monthly Archives: June 2011

At the Rowing Club (or – The truth about sports)

– I think it’s going to be close! – It’s not going to be close. Either they’re going to win, or we are.

Other ways of seeing

An A-W of (alternative) artistic terminology   Arte Povera – affordable art Brücke, die – German successors to the Fauvists (later disbanded amid accusations of Fauvoritism) colour – the new ‘black’ deconstruction – critic’s hatchet-job Edvard Munch – AaaaaaaaAAAAARRRGHH!! Freud – act of ripping people off Gauguin – one employed in knocking out Tahitian pearl […]

Graphology (preliminary results)

Man A has the handwriting of an intellectual. Which is to say ‘of a child’. (Which is to say ‘of a child intellectual’. Not ‘an intellectual child’.)

If your love were true…

I can’t help but feel that at some point in the last two years you’d have learned how to use the conditional tense.

Musical note

MEMO – start a band called ‘the lower-case Ts’

15 years of laughing at ‘Art’

Critic (and diarist) ASH Smyth reflects on the pitfalls of modern art, the vagaries of friendship, and the comic role he’s always wanted.   ‘My friend Serge has bought a painting…’  1997. Ish . See ‘Art’, Yasmina Reza’s comedy of mannerism, for the first time (Wyndhams Theatre, London). Show has hit the West End running: […]


(for the British School in Colombo yearbook 2010/11) 1. So, what’s with the beard? After I graduated from the War Studies Faculty at KCL I rather fancied myself as a war correspondent, so I grew the beard. Then I just rather fancied myself. 2. We somehow get the impression that you are always very sarcastic […]

Textual infidelity

I keep my condoms in a copy of Anna Karenina. My girlfriend hasn’t read it.

Was ist Lydia? (homage)

I  If only I’d been born Lydia Davis I’d have written a lot less.   II  The Lydia Davis School of Banter – Call me, bitch. – Don’t call me bitch.   III  Flaubert, revised ‘“A good sentence in prose,” says Flaubert, “should be like a good line in poetry, unchangeable, as rhythmic, as sonorous.”’ […]