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Author Archives: A S H Smyth

Egyptomania

Saturday, October 8, 2016

Review of three books on Ancient Egypt: Egypt: People, Pharaohs, Gods, by Rose-Marie and Rainer Hagen; Egyptomania: A History of Fascination, Obsession and Fantasy, by Ronald H. Fritze; and Writings from Ancient Egypt, by Toby Wilkinson. — For The Spectator

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Lines composed upon a can of Stella, spilt over my laptop

Tuesday, October 4, 2016

.             *–   #]# ~ 0#]@~9*. /70 +69574859658410+-*8+/98-+639*74 .             +/88-9+63   .             +-20300.20 .             ~~ .             ]+-3 -*82105263120152485-/

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WHAT’S YOUR CARTHAGINIAN-GENERAL-WHO-IS-UNFAIRLY-DEEMED-LESS-NOTEWORTHY-THAN-HIS-CARTHAGINIAN-GENERAL-BROTHER NAME?

Thursday, September 29, 2016

Your Carthaginian-General-who-is-Unfairly-Deemed-Less-Noteworthy-than-his-Carthaginian-General-Brother Name is: Hasdrubal .

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Dr Johnfon’s Ducktionary – or; fome juvenilia, revifed upon mature confideration

Thursday, September 22, 2016

In this place (as oppofed to that) Is repofited horizontally a Hearty, wholefome and falubrious Young male exemplum of fub-genus Water fowl (be it wild or be it tame), The accufative fingular of which Samuel Johnson – Artium Magifter, Legum Doctor (honoris caufa) – Did trample and crufh most Contemptibly beneath his foot; Suppofing it […]

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The Top Fifteen Or So Wittiest Oscar Wilde Quotes – according to his Twitter output (last 24hrs)

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

1) ‘Think tattoos have to be bold and dark? Think again! Check out these stunning white ink tats!’ 2) ‘You can’t get your childhood back but you can recreate it! Check out these awesome recreation photos.’ 3) ‘Wanna see a real-life Barbie doll? This is not Photoshopped! You’ve gotta see this to believe it’ 4) […]

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WHAT’S YOUR AFRIKAANS-TRANSLATOR NAME?

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Your Afrikaans-Translator Name is L’Angoustine Bezuidenhout .

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Enclosures. [fragments]

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

We advise you to take delivery of securities purchased fr bankers. We prefer this course and we always advise our — Trustees of the Economic Bank of Form upon which to put forward by the Tr ……….We shall be gl return it to us as quickl the proposals being carrie being a payment at the […]

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Ayenbite of Inwyt

Sunday, September 4, 2016

Against the temptings of the Devil, say the following: ‘Sweet Jesu, by thine holy blood that thou sheddest, and thy rood, for me and for mankind – I entreat Him be my shield against the wicked enemy unto my life’s end. So be it.’ This book is Master Michel’s of Northgate, written in English by […]

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Bertrand Russell wishes you a happy marriage

Sunday, August 28, 2016

for Paul and Beth (from volumes found at their engagement party) . ‘Whitehead and Russell’s Principia Mathematica is famous for taking a thousand pages to prove that 1+1=2.’ — Mark Dominus ‘To say shortly why one values love is not easy.’ — Bertrand Russell . I know what life and love may be. . . […]

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Heroes in error

Saturday, August 6, 2016

Review of War Porn. — For The Spectator

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